He hadn't wanted an organic partner… but he'd been wrong to think his relationship with Kay would be any less deep, any less complex. And hurt any less to lose. He knew better now. Anyway, he wasn't choosing a partner in Jyn. He was holding onto the bond already there. home. family.
He heard her breathing before he looked up; it made him look up. Her heaving breaths, the shaking shoulders, the shine of tears… without thinking, he slipped off the bed and went on his knees before her. Stopping shy of trying to take her hands; looking up into her face.]
No… I… think I knew you'd understand. I know you understand war. And so much we have in common. I wanted… however we go from here… to be your choice. You've not had a choice so many times. And… I've… manipulated people, lied to them, so many times.
['Course, he hadn't been able to manipulate Jyn even when he'd wanted to—We're not here to make friends. Ten minutes later: Anyone who kills me or my friends…!
Was that the first moment he'd felt… for her…?]
If you deserve…? I'm being a selfish bastard.
I trust you. I don't trust me. If I felt I was making you make decisions without enough information, because I hadn't given it to you…? …I don't know if this makes any sense. I just…
…I guess it wasn't about you. I'm sorry. It was about me. Assumed or implied consent isn't enough. For me. With you.
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/HUGS!/ SORRY!!
Date: 2019-06-28 06:08 am (UTC)He hadn't wanted an organic partner… but he'd been wrong to think his relationship with Kay would be any less deep, any less complex. And hurt any less to lose. He knew better now. Anyway, he wasn't choosing a partner in Jyn. He was holding onto the bond already there. home. family.
He heard her breathing before he looked up; it made him look up. Her heaving breaths, the shaking shoulders, the shine of tears… without thinking, he slipped off the bed and went on his knees before her. Stopping shy of trying to take her hands; looking up into her face.]
No… I… think I knew you'd understand. I know you understand war. And so much we have in common. I wanted… however we go from here… to be your choice. You've not had a choice so many times. And… I've… manipulated people, lied to them, so many times.
['Course, he hadn't been able to manipulate Jyn even when he'd wanted to—We're not here to make friends. Ten minutes later: Anyone who kills me or my friends…!
Was that the first moment he'd felt… for her…?]
If you deserve…? I'm being a selfish bastard.
I trust you. I don't trust me. If I felt I was making you make decisions without enough information, because I hadn't given it to you…? …I don't know if this makes any sense. I just…
…I guess it wasn't about you. I'm sorry. It was about me. Assumed or implied consent isn't enough. For me. With you.