I hardly thought that my tendency to get impatient was something to be lauded. But if you like it, I suppose I shouldn't try to ... hold it at bay. But that's still not going to stop me from asking for a hint at least.
[Jyn might be competitive, but she realizes that in either case, both she and Kanan win, and isn't that the most important thing?]
Nothing like that, I promise. Think more along the lines of me completely calling the shots when we're alone. And I do have some ideas about what I want to do with you.
[It is meant in a mostly teasing manner - and if she got the feeling that he was the least bit uncomfortable with it, she'd cease using it completely. But until then, using it every now and again shouldn't be too much.]
Don't tell me - you like that about me, too?
It's not as though I've ever tried to hide it. [And why would she? He's been a bright spot in a sea of darkness, and all she wants is to hold on to that for as long as she can.] Don't worry - I don't intend on not telling you exactly how I feel.
[Kanan chuckles lightly in his bunk. Of course Jyn would insist on a hint.]
All right, all right, one hint. Zero gravity.
[Because everyone should try sex while floating at least once in their lives.
Oh. Oh. He likes that idea more than he wants to admit. Enough that he squirms a bit uncomfortably in his bed while he imagines how that would go. He might need a cold shower sooner than he thought.]
All right, I can do that. But first, you need to win our little bet.
[And even if he plans to let her win...maybe, he'll make Jyn work for it.]
I do, but then again, there's very little I don't like about you.
[She's been a light in his life as well, and given how the war is dragging itself and hard it's been on all Rebels, including the Specters, he plans on holding on to her for as long as he can, as long as Jyn will let him to.]
[Really, Kanan could have held her off for a little while longer until she caved in and asked nicely, but those two words were all she needed to know.
If she makes a strangled little noise in response, she'll never tell. But she does curl up a little more comfortably in her bunk, and wishes, not for the first time, that she wasn't alone in it.]
Oh, I do like that. Consider me very, very interested.
Of course I'm going to win. Failure isn't an option. Even though I'm curious to find out just what you'd have me wear for you.
[She rolls her eyes fondly, and nibbles at her bottom lip , already compiling a list of possible ways that he could win. Kanan would make for a tough competitor, of that she is sure.]
I almost want to say that you're a glutton for punishment for saying that, but the truth is that I like hearing it, and knowing that with you, I don't have to be anything or anyone other than exactly who I am.
[It makes her happy, which is a sentiment that she always thought was just beyond her grasp. And she doesn't know much about how to make him feel the same way in return, but she's sure that she wants to try.
[Oh, Kanan would rather have her ask nicely for other things, especially things they do when they are together. He smiles at her answer, almost wishing they would get to home-base at the same time soon.]
Good. Let it motivate you. [Yes, that's Jedi wisdom applied to sex. No, Kanan doesn't see any problem with it.]
We can always revisit that if you win our bet.
[Kanan has enough experience in lovemaking (thank you years of being lost to the Force, he supposes) to be a formidable adversary, but his best weapon is that he knows Jyn's body and what she like enough to capitalize on it. And even if he plans to let her win, she might truly have trouble walking the day after.
Even if she can't see it, his smile softens:]
I know all about hiding who you really are and what it does to you. I would never ask that from you, Jyn.
[She lets him be who he really is, with all of his flaws and strengths, that's enough to make him happy.]
[It's not as though she was averse to the idea of having to ask nicely for what she wanted most - but only because she knew that Kanan would always give it to her. Maybe he'd delay it, but they'd both end up satisfied.
If she rolled her eyes at the sentiment, she'd never tell. Jedi tenets probably weren't meant to be used in a sexual manner, but they'd work with it.]
I'm counting on it.
[The only thing Jyn had to complain about was never having enough time to truly luxuriate in each other. But that would change, she hoped, with all the work they were all doing to turn the tide of the war.
And until then, she'd just have to enjoy whatever moments they were able to steal with each other - every moment that they were able to remind each other about what they were fighting for - and all the little reminders he left her with, whether it was the marks that littered her body from head to foot, or the twinge she felt in overworked muscles every time she moved the wrong ways.
Sometimes, it was overwhelming knowing that she had the capability to care so deeply, but it gave her all the more motivation to fight all the harder.
There was nothing she wanted more than Kanan - in every way possible.]
I've grown tired of hiding who I am. I'm so lucky that I don't have to do that with.
[In all honesty, there is nothing Kanan likes more than hearing Jyn asks for what she wants from him. Even when he would try to draw out her pleasure for as long as he can (and it's often not the case, because someone is always bound to disturb them), to see her come undone in his arms is a sight he cherishes deeply.
Surely, some of the old Masters are rolling in their grave at that!]
All right then, I'll try to find a place where neither of us can be found for days
[Because Kanan is not patient enough to wait until the end of the war. Better to create their own opportunities to be with each other for as long and for as often as they can then to wait for the conflict to be done. That option leaves too much to lose, Kanan knows that all too well.
He has lost enough in his life that he's fighting all the harder not to lose more. His ragtag family and Jyn are the reasons why he fights so hard; to protect them, yes, but mostly so they could see what the galaxy could be without the Empire. He loves them all enough that he wants them to see what their world could be, once at peace.
If there was only one downside to their relationship, it is that it's making him greedy. Greedy for more time spent with her, yes, but it's also the motivation behind his missions. To see her again, but to see the galaxy becoming a place where anyone could have this sort of lightness in their hearts, this...happiness he feels whenever they talk or see each other.
It's the most ironic thing, really, that his emotional attachment to her makes him a better Jedi. Maybe the old Masters were wrong in forbidding them all to love.
He is hers and hers alone, she simply needs to ask.]
I can say the same, really. Although, I could do with less 'hiding' who you are... ;)
[Loneliness and late night equals bad innuendos, when it comes to Kanan.]
[She knows. And while it hasn't been easy letting her walls down to allow him access to every part of her - not just sexually, she fully believes that what they've found with each other is something very special, something that not everyone gets the chance to have.
And now that she knows what it is to let go completely, to trust him with every part of herself and to know that he'll protect her and take care of her and do anything in his power to satisfy her makes her feel like the bond that they've developed is as strong as it can possibly be.
What she feels for Kanan, she's never felt for anyone else. What she feels for Kanan is something that she never wants to feel for someone else.]
Promises, promises.
[A promise that she knows he'll keep, despite the uncertain future that they face. It's why every moment that they have with each other is precious, even if it's doing nothing more than a quick brush of hands as they're rushing in different directions, just the reassurance that they are still there, that they're both still okay.
They both know what it's like to lose everything, and to claw their way back from the precipice. And the last thing that Jyn wants is to lose one more person that she loves - now that she's found her place in the galaxy, now that she's found where she belongs, now that she's cobbled together a strange little family all her own, she'll fight to keep it in tact with every beat of her heart and every ounce of strength in her body.
And in the moments that they're allowed with each other, she'll tirelessly reiterate every single thing that she feels for him, every single wish that she has for a life far and away from what they're currently living, and she'll do it as often as possible.
She doesn't feel weaker for wanting and needing Kanan as much as she does - on the contrary, she feels stronger knowing that she's got him to return to.]
So spend some time discovering me all over again, yeah?
[Luckily enough, Jyn kind of likes those bad innuendos. They make her smile, and that's a gift well-worth receiving.]
if you want to continue this one ...
Date: 2017-12-04 06:21 am (UTC)I hardly thought that my tendency to get impatient was something to be lauded. But if you like it, I suppose I shouldn't try to ... hold it at bay. But that's still not going to stop me from asking for a hint at least.
[Jyn might be competitive, but she realizes that in either case, both she and Kanan win, and isn't that the most important thing?]
Nothing like that, I promise. Think more along the lines of me completely calling the shots when we're alone. And I do have some ideas about what I want to do with you.
[It is meant in a mostly teasing manner - and if she got the feeling that he was the least bit uncomfortable with it, she'd cease using it completely. But until then, using it every now and again shouldn't be too much.]
Don't tell me - you like that about me, too?
It's not as though I've ever tried to hide it. [And why would she? He's been a bright spot in a sea of darkness, and all she wants is to hold on to that for as long as she can.] Don't worry - I don't intend on not telling you exactly how I feel.
Yessss I do!
Date: 2017-12-05 02:41 pm (UTC)All right, all right, one hint. Zero gravity.
[Because everyone should try sex while floating at least once in their lives.
Oh. Oh. He likes that idea more than he wants to admit. Enough that he squirms a bit uncomfortably in his bed while he imagines how that would go. He might need a cold shower sooner than he thought.]
All right, I can do that. But first, you need to win our little bet.
[And even if he plans to let her win...maybe, he'll make Jyn work for it.]
I do, but then again, there's very little I don't like about you.
[She's been a light in his life as well, and given how the war is dragging itself and hard it's been on all Rebels, including the Specters, he plans on holding on to her for as long as he can, as long as Jyn will let him to.]
no subject
Date: 2017-12-06 09:18 am (UTC)If she makes a strangled little noise in response, she'll never tell. But she does curl up a little more comfortably in her bunk, and wishes, not for the first time, that she wasn't alone in it.]
Oh, I do like that. Consider me very, very interested.
Of course I'm going to win. Failure isn't an option. Even though I'm curious to find out just what you'd have me wear for you.
[She rolls her eyes fondly, and nibbles at her bottom lip , already compiling a list of possible ways that he could win. Kanan would make for a tough competitor, of that she is sure.]
I almost want to say that you're a glutton for punishment for saying that, but the truth is that I like hearing it, and knowing that with you, I don't have to be anything or anyone other than exactly who I am.
[It makes her happy, which is a sentiment that she always thought was just beyond her grasp. And she doesn't know much about how to make him feel the same way in return, but she's sure that she wants to try.
And that is something to hold on to, right?]
no subject
Date: 2017-12-08 03:08 am (UTC)Good. Let it motivate you. [Yes, that's Jedi wisdom applied to sex. No, Kanan doesn't see any problem with it.]
We can always revisit that if you win our bet.
[Kanan has enough experience in lovemaking (thank you years of being lost to the Force, he supposes) to be a formidable adversary, but his best weapon is that he knows Jyn's body and what she like enough to capitalize on it. And even if he plans to let her win, she might truly have trouble walking the day after.
Even if she can't see it, his smile softens:]
I know all about hiding who you really are and what it does to you. I would never ask that from you, Jyn.
[She lets him be who he really is, with all of his flaws and strengths, that's enough to make him happy.]
no subject
Date: 2017-12-11 11:52 am (UTC)If she rolled her eyes at the sentiment, she'd never tell. Jedi tenets probably weren't meant to be used in a sexual manner, but they'd work with it.]
I'm counting on it.
[The only thing Jyn had to complain about was never having enough time to truly luxuriate in each other. But that would change, she hoped, with all the work they were all doing to turn the tide of the war.
And until then, she'd just have to enjoy whatever moments they were able to steal with each other - every moment that they were able to remind each other about what they were fighting for - and all the little reminders he left her with, whether it was the marks that littered her body from head to foot, or the twinge she felt in overworked muscles every time she moved the wrong ways.
Sometimes, it was overwhelming knowing that she had the capability to care so deeply, but it gave her all the more motivation to fight all the harder.
There was nothing she wanted more than Kanan - in every way possible.]
I've grown tired of hiding who I am. I'm so lucky that I don't have to do that with.
[Ugh. Emotions were hard.]
no subject
Date: 2017-12-17 12:47 am (UTC)Surely, some of the old Masters are rolling in their grave at that!]
All right then, I'll try to find a place where neither of us can be found for days
[Because Kanan is not patient enough to wait until the end of the war. Better to create their own opportunities to be with each other for as long and for as often as they can then to wait for the conflict to be done. That option leaves too much to lose, Kanan knows that all too well.
He has lost enough in his life that he's fighting all the harder not to lose more. His ragtag family and Jyn are the reasons why he fights so hard; to protect them, yes, but mostly so they could see what the galaxy could be without the Empire. He loves them all enough that he wants them to see what their world could be, once at peace.
If there was only one downside to their relationship, it is that it's making him greedy. Greedy for more time spent with her, yes, but it's also the motivation behind his missions. To see her again, but to see the galaxy becoming a place where anyone could have this sort of lightness in their hearts, this...happiness he feels whenever they talk or see each other.
It's the most ironic thing, really, that his emotional attachment to her makes him a better Jedi. Maybe the old Masters were wrong in forbidding them all to love.
He is hers and hers alone, she simply needs to ask.]
I can say the same, really. Although, I could do with less 'hiding' who you are... ;)
[Loneliness and late night equals bad innuendos, when it comes to Kanan.]
no subject
Date: 2017-12-20 03:27 am (UTC)And now that she knows what it is to let go completely, to trust him with every part of herself and to know that he'll protect her and take care of her and do anything in his power to satisfy her makes her feel like the bond that they've developed is as strong as it can possibly be.
What she feels for Kanan, she's never felt for anyone else. What she feels for Kanan is something that she never wants to feel for someone else.]
Promises, promises.
[A promise that she knows he'll keep, despite the uncertain future that they face. It's why every moment that they have with each other is precious, even if it's doing nothing more than a quick brush of hands as they're rushing in different directions, just the reassurance that they are still there, that they're both still okay.
They both know what it's like to lose everything, and to claw their way back from the precipice. And the last thing that Jyn wants is to lose one more person that she loves - now that she's found her place in the galaxy, now that she's found where she belongs, now that she's cobbled together a strange little family all her own, she'll fight to keep it in tact with every beat of her heart and every ounce of strength in her body.
And in the moments that they're allowed with each other, she'll tirelessly reiterate every single thing that she feels for him, every single wish that she has for a life far and away from what they're currently living, and she'll do it as often as possible.
She doesn't feel weaker for wanting and needing Kanan as much as she does - on the contrary, she feels stronger knowing that she's got him to return to.]
So spend some time discovering me all over again, yeah?
[Luckily enough, Jyn kind of likes those bad innuendos. They make her smile, and that's a gift well-worth receiving.]