All too soon, he was pulled away, leaving Jyn to wonder what that was all about. For all she knew, she might never get the details, especially if it was something for Cassian's ears only. She knew she might have to get used to that, too.
She still had food to finish, and so, she took her time, hoping that he'd return before she found her way back at Medbay, offering her assistance on a more permanent basis.
Cassian reentered the cafeteria a few minutes later, finding Jyn still sitting at their spot. He went and sat down across from her. "Thank you for waiting," he said.
"Of course", she answered, offering the hint of a smile even as she watched him intently, looking for any sign of unease. Here probably wasn't the best place to ask anything, though, not with so many eyes and ears around. "We can leave, if you'd like. I'm finished."
"Okay," he said with a nod. There wasn't anything wrong, per se, just an update on that new droid. He got up and went with her to drop off her tray and dishes before leaving the cafeteria, heading back to their room.
That would be good to hear. Less worrisome, anyway. Usually when someone got pulled away like that, it meant something urgent. With the tray put away, it was easy enough to keep that respectable distance away on the walk back to the privacy of their quarters, every now and again nodding a greeting at a latecomer passing by.
"They picked up five KX-series security droids," he replied. "Like K2." When Draven pulled him aside earlier, he had no idea what he was going to be tasked with so when Draven said he wanted Cassian to reprogram the five new droids some Alliance troops picked up earlier, he was surprised. Draven said that one'll be assigned to him on his missions - he'd have to do upkeep and whatever else like he did with K2. When he told Cassian he'd be getting a new droid, he didn't think it would be this soon. "They're having me reprogram all of them."
"Oh!", she breathed, her tentative smile widening just a touch. That was not the news that she was expecting to hear, if she was really expecting anything at all rather than dreading it. She'd become accustomed to and spoiled by the sheer amount of time they've been able to spend together while Cassian was recovering. Couldn't last forever, after all, with so much still to be done. She knew that Kay could never be replaced, but this could be a good thing. "How do you feel about that?"
"I'm not sure," he said, his answer slow and deliberate. If Draven was already pairing him up with a droid, it wouldn't be long until Cassian had to leave to go on assignments. He didn't want to leave Jyn's side yet - if ever.
It was only a matter of time - they both knew that, no matter how much Jyn tried to ignore the inevitable. But it would still take some time to reprogram the droids, so there was that. "Yeah, me neither."
"Mmm," he said in response to her statement. He went and sat on the edge of the bed so he could take off his boots, thinking all the while. "When you were a child, what did you want to be when you grew up?"
Jyn toed hers off, as well, more than ready to take a little break and to get a little more comfortable. It was a good question, and one she didn't really know how to answer. "I suppose I never thought much about it, really. I did help my mother and father with their work, when I could, so I think I thought I'd follow in their footsteps. What about you?"
"I don't know," he said, lying back on their bed and looking up at the ceiling. The future seemed so uncertain when he was a child. It was so hard for him to grasp that he would grow into an adult who would eventually have to choose a path to take. "I don't know. I wanted to make this galaxy a better place."
She soon follows suit, quiet as she curls up close to his side, automatically reaching for his hand, always happy to thread their fingers together in order to be close. "Do you feel as if you've managed to do that - even just a little?"
"Maybe a little," he said and then he chuckled but there wasn't any warmth behind it. "I imagined myself being a hero...not - not gathering intel from sources in back alleys and underground rooms." He looked over at her.
It's a familiar sound if only because she's made the same one more than occasion. "Why do you think that you're not a hero? Look at what we did on Scarif. If that isn't heroic, I don't know what is." She knew that he meant the things he'd done previously - and might be called upon to do again. "You're my hero."
He smiled at her almost sadly when she called him her hero. He'd never heard such kinder words from anyone before. Unlike X-Wing pilots, his heroism wasn't visible. He didn't have a flashy uniform or a team. It was only himself.
Maybe that was part of the problem; that he couldn't be recognized for many of his actions. But here in the quiet, Jyn could - and it might not make much of a difference, but she'd do it anyway, if it helped if even just a little. "Couldn't have gotten the plans out without you. I wouldn't be here without you. Cassian ... you do know what you mean to me, don't you?"
He didn't do it for the acknowledgment or praise - he did everything that was asked of him by the Alliance because he thought it was right - the right thing to do. He justified all the deaths caused by his hand - all the assignments given to him - He justified everything that made him questioned the Alliance's morality because it was the right thing to do. "I do." He did - at least he thought he did.
Right didn't mean easy, and it certainly didn't always mean totally moral. But they did what was necessary to get the job done. But even then, just knowing that his efforts were appreciated could go a long way toward ... keeping up morale. Especially now. "You're my everything."
"I am", she answered, returning the smile. "And you're mine". And then, if Jyn had anything else to say (and she probably did), it was lost in the moment that their lips met, and her eyes fluttered shut, and she took the opportunity to fully enjoy just being together.
Despite both of them having a hard exterior with walls built high around them, Jyn has made him soft and gentle and it wasn't a bad thing at all. This is the first time he's ever experienced such tenderness with another person.
When he broke the kiss after a few seconds, he opened his eyes and kissed her forehead. "Thank you."
He's helped her accept and embrace that part of herself, too, and she's learned not to fight against it or be afraid of it like she'd been used to. Now, between the two of them, it felt as natural as breathing.
She hummed softly, slow to open her eyes to take him in. "Did I help?"
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Date: 2017-01-08 07:30 am (UTC)She still had food to finish, and so, she took her time, hoping that he'd return before she found her way back at Medbay, offering her assistance on a more permanent basis.
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Date: 2017-01-08 07:31 pm (UTC)"Remember that U-Wing I told you about when I came back?" He asked, getting right into it.
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Date: 2017-01-09 04:03 am (UTC)When he broke the kiss after a few seconds, he opened his eyes and kissed her forehead. "Thank you."
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Date: 2017-01-09 04:22 am (UTC)She hummed softly, slow to open her eyes to take him in. "Did I help?"
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